The Incredible Life/Live It!

What was it about Darryl Stingley that moved him to live an inspired and accomplished life after a career-ending and crippling injury? According to New England Patriots CEO Robert Kraft it was Stingley's positive and generous attitude.

"He (Stingley) was passionate about his faith and his family and always showed compassion for others," said Kraft in a Patriot press release (http://www.patriots.com/). "In my conversations with Darryl, he always spoke of the future, not the past. I don't think he ever held grudges and I know that he was uncomfortable accepting anyone's sympathy. He wanted to find ways to positively impact the lives of those around him and did so throughout his life."

He certainly did. In addition to being a consultant for the Patriots from his home in Chicago for 12 years following his injury, Stingley:

• Wrote a memoir of his life and of his injury titled Happy to Be Alive in 1983.


• Returned to Purdue University in 1991 to complete his studies and receive a bachelor in arts degree at the school's commencement ceremony in 1992.


• Founded the Darryl Stingley Youth Foundation in Chicago in 1993, with a mission to service the needs of the city's youth with an emphasis on assisting underprivileged at-risk children on the city's west side, where he grew up.


• Was inducted as a member of the Chicago Sports Hall of Fame and was awarded an honorary doctorate of humanities from Springfield (Mass.) College in 1985.
  

The lesson? Pain dealt Stingley the most terrible blow. With the wrong attitude, he could have lived a diminished life and many would have understood. Instead, with the right attitude, he lived an incredible life that many look upon and admire.

When pain comes knocking at your door, what attitude will you answer it with?

The Incredible Life/Go Deep

Darryl Stingley was the third of three first round draft picks selected by the NFL New England Patriots in 1973, according to a biographical article on the Pats official Web site. He showed great promise as a wide receiver in the three years to come.


But it was in 1977 that Darryl showcased his potential as one of the game's top receivers. According to ESPN, he finished the season with 39 catches, a 16.8-yard average and five touchdowns, a fantastic performance in an era when defensive backs were allowed to hit receivers all over the field. An era when receivers were fair game and helmet-to-helmet hits weren't illegal.


It was in the 1978 season, during an exhibition game with the Oakland Raiders, that Darryl took an especially violent hit that broke his neck and ended his football career. Instantly, he was paralyzed, a quadraplegic, and he spent the next 29 years in a wheelchair. He died April 5, 2007 from the multiple after-affects he suffered as a result of the injury.

Imagine being where this 26-year-old was following that injury, lying on the field, wondering what his life would be like from that point forward, asking the question "Why?" The signs weren't good. From that perspective, it's likely that the only thing one could see would be a diminished life.

Then what prompted Patriots Chairman and CEO Robert Kraft to say on the occasion of Stingley's death, "I had the pleasure of meeting Darryl on multiple occasions and was touched by his positive outlook on life."?

Kraft said more in a Patriots press release--all of it a glowing account of an inspirational life, filled with accomplishments born out of a positive attitude. Let's examine Stingley's incredible life after the pain in Friday's installment.

The Incredible Life/Think About It

As my bio explains, I've lived over a half century of life. Among the things I've observed: I don't see anyone escaping pain.

Pain comes to all who reside in the land of the living. Usually uninvited, it shows up at your door in many forms--disillusionment, disappointments, crushed dreams, broken relationships, diminishing health, catastrophic events, tragedy. No one, unfortunately, is immune. It would be nice to be able to buy a pass to avoid it, like in Monopoly. (If you find a vendor selling one of those get-out-of-pain-free cards, be sure and let me know.)

Knowing that it's inevitable, the question then becomes, "How will you deal with pain?"

It's an extremely important question, because how you deal with the pain that interrupts your life will determine whether you emerge with a diminished life or an incredible life.

Earlier this year, we were reminded of an incredible life that rose out of the ashes of devastating pain to truly soar--albeit from the vantage point of a wheel chair. His name was Darryl Stingley, former wide receiver for the NFL New England Patriots.

We'll explore the incredible life he built in the midst of pain beginning Wednesday. How do you deal with pain? Think about it!